love

i knew that what i really hate was myself.And i would hate us both so much when he was dead.

but the bell rang.Saved by the bell-how cliche.We were both saved from death.I,saved for just a short time from being the nightmarish creature I feared and loathed.. sorry for my never ending selfishness. Sorry that he was so unfortunate as to have inspired this first,tragic love of mine.Sorry also for the things beyond my control-that i'd been the monster chosen by fate to end his life in the first place.